Sure, you’re dated prime real estate before, all wrapped up in one beautiful package. Now your best bet is to date a woman who works as a real estate agent. Why? Here are the top 10 reasons.
Hey, you won’t have to plant a fly in your meal anymore when you eat out to get it at half price. Now you can just (kindly) ask her to submit it as a tax deduction.
She surfs online for deals on party favors with one hand while she grants your $%$@#* a favor with her other hand. She can plan rockin’ parties in her sleep and, yup, you think you’ll keep this real estate agent as your girlfriend.
3.Easy To Reach
She’s used to fielding calls from home buyers and other real estate agents. Her iPhone is always close by, which comes in handy when your car breaks down again, and you need to ask her to pick up some groceries. She’s always better at picking out the melons anyway.
4.Friends Love Her
Your real estate agent, aka girlfriend, is magically delicious. She easily inserts herself into conversations with your friends and oozes charms. She’s had to hone her people skills during her career so much that she’s the human version of Lucky Charms cereal.
5.She Simplifies Stuff
Check out the superpower of Miss Realtor! She can break down complex terms into simple words anyone can understand, thanks to years of explaining 200-page contracts to new homeowners. She’ll explain the Caramilk secret to you when she gets home later, but you just want to eat her yummy filling instead.
6.Flexible As All Hell
Choose a real estate agent for your next girlfriend and she’ll find time for you. She freelances, so her job isn’t 9-5, which works great with your schedule. She’s a flexible find, even outside of the bedroom.
You’ve had wet dreams about being schooled by the teacher for being bad. Now your clever girlfriend is teaching you when to sell and when to hold onto a property. You’ll hold onto this smart fox. Yes indeedy.
8.Late Night Convos
You no longer need to worry about whether calling her at 11 pm will wake her up. She’s working long hours and is just as much of a night owl as you. Tell her to keep staying up late too; soon you’ll be able to afford a bigger house.
9.Change It Up
Routines are boring, and she’s so not. She’s changing your dinner plans again because of a walkthrough, but you know full well that if you go along with it that you’ll get some action later.
10.Savvy In The City
Your real estate gal sure knows her way around the city after months of showing homes across the region. She’s a master at driving the shortest routes to get to the bar, as well as knowing where to wine and dine on the cheap. Talk about a keeper!
Are you thinking about switching your “type” to be realtors? We don’t blame you. When your next girlfriend is a real estate agent, you’ll have a lady on your arm who charms your friends, is easily available by phone, writes off dinners, and offers you tons of other great perks. She can cum to your open house any day.